As many of my friends and patients already know, I recently got sick. Likely Covid-19 sick– fevers, sweats, episodic breathing issues, and unrelenting exhaustion for a good 23 days. Fortunately I had a well-stocked herbal dispensary at home and treated it via Chinese Medicine from the first symptom, and have yet to stop. But, it was a journey… to say the least.
Just prior to getting sick, I was running on empty. I had a few major stressors that had reached culmination in my personal life. My business had taken off in leaps and bounds and admittedly I had more patients than I my processes could handle. Seemingly, not the worst of problems. But, specializing in chronic illness requires a lot out of a practitioner. The mind rarely rests. The late night/early morning messages are a common thing. My work far extended regular office hours. I wanted to be everything for all of them, and I burned the candle at both ends doing it. And the end of the day there wasn’t enough left over for me, much less my family. I was spread thin and doing a lot of juggling. I lost pieces of myself. I was exhausted. I missed ease. I didn’t know how to stop. But, I also had a deep passion for the amazing work I was doing and my dear patients. It enlivened me in so many ways. It was a hard position. Looking back, it’s easy to play the ‘should have’ game, but in truth it all unfolded perfectly – just as it was meant to be. Life is a beautiful series of lessons.
In turn, my intuitive and physical body forced me back into alignment – remembering who I am – via my longest acute illness to date. Once the fear of what I contracted subsided, I was able to shift into embracing it. And it then became my teacher. I stayed in bed for weeks, with my dear husband waiting on me hand and foot (I literally had a bell to ring. 🤍). I called upon colleagues for help. I asked one of my teachers to prescribe my herb protocols. I had regular remote Medical Qi Gong sessions. I welcomed the fevers. I meditated and prayed daily. Received the most loving and crystallized visions from Spirit. I talked regularly to my dearest girlfriends. I put hours upon hours in on Netflix and Gaia. I sweated and burnt everything out of me that needed to go. Detoxing in every possible way. I let texts, emails, messages go until I felt called to respond to them. And let the guilt with it go as well. For over 3 weeks I barely left my bed. I yielded. Was there fear there of this illness going south? Yes and no. When I engaged with the news via social media, the fear ripped through me. (Pro-health tip: Dial back the news, peeps. 🤍) When I shut out the world and tuned in to myself and Spirit, I knew this illness was blessing me with lessons on how to love and care for myself. And in turn, knowing the rebirth would be worth every moment of it all.
As my illness journey is now nearing completion, I’m starting to feel ALIVE again. In waves. If I overdo it, my body is quick to remind me the importance of pacing. And I’m listening. But… The birdsong outside my window every morning brings me joy. As does the beautiful spring bloom all around me. I’m literally taking time to smell my gorgeous rose bushes daily. Taking time to embrace the little joys. All the while, spending time in the macro realms re-visiting my soul alignment.
My physical practice’s future is unknown. (Although I’m still doing some telemedicine and loving the flexibility of it.) Not only did I close the doors to my physical location due to the pandemic, but the healing center I had been practicing out of is closing its doors permanently at the end of the month. So, I’m starting over. After a beautiful, yet perfectly timed, forced pause. Re-envisioning my new practice. My purpose. Honoring myself. All the while, feeling so blessed that I have been gifted this beautiful reset/rebirth. 
- Burnout. Pause. Reset. Rebirth. - April 25, 2020
- A Chinese Medicine Practitioner’s Perspective on Treating PANDAS/PANS. - December 28, 2019
- Gentle Holiday Reminder. - December 22, 2019
